India

As Seen Through My Eyes


My friends who go abroad and come back tell me many stories about how the roads are so clean in Singapore, about how everything is so neat and punctual in Japan, who it's wild fun in Australia, how interesting people are in Africa, how rich life is in Dubai, how cold it is in Russia, what freedom in France or the excellent technology in Germany, how there is so much space and resources in America and how everything is so fine everywhere else but India. I agree. But yet all these travellers go around the world and love to relax and cool their heels and breathe the air of freedom in dear Mother India.
To someone who gave me the greatest gift of life in the land of spiritual fragrance and the wisdom of freedom, this is my offering.

India That Is

India - the mighty nation -
From Kashmir to Kanyakumari
Every bit of her land breathes spirituality.
The beautious hills of Kashmir
The wheat fields of Punjab
The expansive green plains of
Uttar Pradesh, where the Ganga
Showers her bounty
The wise people of Bengal
Monks and monasteries of Bihar
The sun that rises
Behind the hills on Arunachal Pradesh
The Arabian coasts of
Gujarat and Maharashtra
God's beautiful land
Down Kerala and golden Karnataka
Picturesque Orissa and
Effervescent Andhra Pradesh
Vibrant Tamil Nadu
With her gracious hospitality
A Madhya Pradesh in the centre
And so many more members has she
She speaks many tongues
and many customs and cultures has she
She is a beautiful woman
A mother welling with compassion
A lot of hungry mouths to feed
Nevertheless she cares
For the whole world.
She breathes in love
And exhales spiritual power
No army can conquer
No enemy can hurt
No mightier power ever destroy
Her loving territory
She welcomes warmly
The guests who seek her
When the world is in distress
She rushes for help
With comforting arms
And strong shoulders
My India stands
A symbol of strength
Her love for the Universe
Is the source of her energy.
Like the tree that bends
To let the wind pass by
She has weathered many an invasive storm
Only to stand up to the world
And exclaim aloud
Fear not, I am with thee.

(And for those who are doubtful about the truth of all this, can count one person in the whole billion, who has experienced and expressed this truth - Myself. I stand testimony.)

Swahilya.

Writing happens

...only in meditation

I am back to the blog world with lots of love and inspiration. But, a mind on chat mode actually gets torn apart into bits and pieces. It takes a lot of meditation to get back into one piece. Writing for a blog demands that much effort. I find that when the mind gets filled with small, fleeting ideas and too many people who are just acquaintances, at the the click of a button, it is very difficult to really settle down for some quiet contemplation.
So I pray to my muse for some clarity and wait in patience till I have have something substantial to say, rather than just blog.
This weekend, I am looking forward to going to Kollam, God's Own Capital in God's Own Country. Primarily, it's for a friend's wedding. But I may also go to Amritapuri and the Parabrahma Temple - where there is no deity, if the time and situation allows.
Namaste. Swaha.

Chattering

....In Chatroom

So for the past two days, besides my office work, I have got myself into a new exercise - chatting on the net at the internet cafes. It is an old thing for many, but I was introduced to it just now and Oh My God - what a noisy room it is. There is actually no noise, but the noise of the human mind is most visible in a chatroom.
Totally engrossing, I don't realise an hour has gone by as I answer different types of questions from e-chatters - the experience makes me feel like an Ashtavadhani - adept at doing eight different things at a time. Indeed it is so, shifting between several layers of matter and spirit. That's the reason I am less on my blog these days.
It is ofcourse meditation of a different kind!

Gopura Darshanam

....Papa Vimochanam

This request from blogger, Hari the Hadron has taken me to writing about the temples I visited that I have so far slipped my blogging mind.
It was at Hyderabad recently that a sudden opportunity arose to visit the Gurdwara at Bidar in Karnataka. With four other volunteers from Akshara Foundations, Hyderabad, including Jaswinder Singh, whose idea it was - we set off on a four-hour journey by car. Devotees say that Guru Nanak visited the spot where the ground water was totally salty and with a touch t turned into sweet drinking water. Even today, the Amrit Kund at the temple has a spring of fresh water gurgling out with a taste that is beyond ordinary description.
Washing the feet in the small pool of water as one enters the flight of steps was a holy experience and the silence and sound of Kirtans, repeating the chants of 'Ek Onkar, Sat Nam, Nir Bhav...' partaking of parshad of rotis and pyaj pickle which we had to receive with both our hands, the common cleaning of plates and tumblers of all those who had their parshad by a father, mother and their little son, and return journey to Hyderabad at midnight with all the blessings from the priests at the Gurudwara.
The recent trip to Thiruvarur, our first temple stop was at the Chidambaram Nataraja Temple. Travelling with a big group, I left all my belongings in my vehicle and walked in with empty hands into the temple. It was Swami Akshara who walked along with us who told us that taking flowers or fruits as an offering was equal to trading with the divine: I'll give you this and You give this to me! But walking empty-handed was, I discovered the ultimate freedom in worship - No tickets to buy, no queues to wait but just standing in front of the Cosmic Dancer and meditating upon his form - not disturbing anybody or not being disturbed myself.
While we were at Chidambaram at the thick of activity with archakas and dikshithars busy with abishekams and people busy offering prayers, at Thyagarajaswamy Temple in Tiruvarur where we went the next day it was when all the main Sannidhis were closed and just the Prakaram was half open. Chanting my favourite Brahma Murari Suruarchita Lingam with abandon as the chants resonated through the corridors - I was filled with the imposing silence and the aura of the temple.
There was also a surprise visit to Velankanni Shrine. Meditating on the sad form of Jesus Christ at the main shrine, I could experience the emotions of one who took on the burden of all those who came to him in prayer. Our Lady of Health with a chubby child in her arms was the very symbol of a loving mother whose presence heals.
At the end of the tour, I saw that whether it is Mary or Mari, Dakshinamurthy or Sankara, they are all forms that take our mind to unite it with the cosmos which has all the energy in it. Offering myself fully, I return enriched with energy to face the day-today world with more awareness.

*****

The Dance of the Cosmos

Back after a break from Time

Providence gave me a five day break from the daily rigmarole. And what a break it was indeed! A time for lots of contemplation. When I was just chanting some verses from the Gita, my fingers automatically formed into some mudras. This spurred my interest in learning Bharatanatyam. On further thought I discovered that Bharatanatyam is one art form is an expression of the sublime divinity in oneself.
I didn't lose much time to pursue an interest of my childhood. Now I have not begun learning dance, but I have started dancing in the presence of my Bharatanatyam Guru, Thanjavoor Rajalakshmi.
This happened after my visit to the Chidambaram Nataraja temple with my Guru, Swami Akshara - meditating on the form of Nataraja - the Lord of Dance.
It was an enormous experience of silence and sound to chant shlokas in the empty corridor and mandapams of the ancient Thyagarajaswami Temple at Thiruvarur - the deity after whom the musical saint Thyagaraja was named.
Difficult to pack the experiences of five days in one blog...

Namo Namah Shri Guru Padukabhyam

The Feet of the Guru

As I was chanting 'Sarva Dharman Parithyajya,' the image of Tirupati Balaji flashed, one hand bestowing grace and the other hand pointing towards the feet. The feet of the Guru, I thought is to where I have to set my eyes on, for it is part of his self that roots the truth to the Earth.
In the evening, a satsangh at Akshara Foundations in Chennai to celebrate Swami Akshara's birthday was a revealing experience moment to moment.

Celebrations often go with chanting and this time it was with the Guru Paduka Stotram, each verse culminating with 'Namo Namah Shri Gurupadukabhyam.' Chanting of shlokas in these satsanghs have each time revealed the higher truths contained in the verses like some secret reservoirs. The lilting Lingashtakam, eight verses in praise of the Shiva Lingam, chanted in satsanghs have always revealed precious secrets of the divine presence and taken me to the gigantic expanse of the Universe that the Lingam is.

We were blessed with a message from Swamiji, now in Chandigarh, where a four-day programme, 'Meditation First Solution Next,' just concluded.
"The Guru is a bridge that connects you to God. He is not the goal, but he is just the medium. The birthday of the Guru is only an occasion to remind you that you should not deviate from the goal of your life. Through his limited form, you will reach the unlimited," Swamiji said in the message that was read out.
On the the role of a Guru, he said, "Just as water cannot be heated without a vessel, without a Guru, you cannot experience the world or God. The vessel is the medium for water to be heated. The Guru functions that way. You warm up yourself to the experiences of the world and God with the Guru's presence."

My experience of listening to Swamiji's words has always been that they are not mere words but carry some hidden force that shatter useless thought constructions just as old buildings are demolished with pendulum gongs. With the ground levelled of wasteful imageries and the soil tilled, the artesian wells of fresh creative thought spring forth throwing up visions of the bliss of transcendence.

******

Sambhavami Yuge Yuge

When Dharma Declines I Come

When thoughts about recent happenings crowded my mind, I was chasing this or that thought for sometime and got nowhere. Dropping it all, I just sat down, for I learnt that solutions spring from a quiet mind.

"Sarvadharman Parithyajya Mamekam Sharanam Vraja
Aham Thwa Sarvapapebhyaha Moksha Ishyami Ma Shuchaha."

The words of Krishna to Arjuna at the end of the Gitopadesham sounded loud and clear. Surrender is the way, says Krishna. The Upadesham was happening - leave aside all the thoughts and surrender to the silent presence within. That will liberate you from all the sins - thoughts that pull you here and there, tearing you asunder and not letting you to get focussed on your goal - and grant you Moksha - liberate you from the trappings of thoughts and ideas that pull you down.

After a while, the most popular verses of the Gita came to my mind.

"Yada Yada Hi Dharmasya Glanir Bhavati Bharatha
Abhyuthanam Adharmasya Tadathmanam Srijamyaham.

Parithranaya Sadhunam Vinashayacha Dushkritham
Dharma Samsthapanarthaya Sambhavami Yuge Yuge."

I nearly found myself an Arjuna, confounded in the battle field - throwing himself at the feet of Sri Krishna. Chanting these verses over and over again, I got the essence of it later in the day.

"Whenever there is a fall in Dharma and a rise in Adharma, I come." It is all in the mind. When there is a dance of destruction and the principles of sustenance become weak in me, I who am always present and watching will take charge and set things in balance for you.

"To protect the good and to destroy evil and establish Dharma, I manifest." - When my little mind for long was thinking that the good is somebody and the bad is somebody else and the manifestation happens to destroy the evil-doers, the message was loud and clear. It is to resurruct the qualities of goodness within me that have taken a backseat, shuddering with fear of what has happened and to vanquish my thoughts that cause me to forget my goal, I come.

I realised today: The Krishna is Me. The Arjuna is Me. The Good is Me. The Bad is Me. It is I that Acts through everything and everybody to raise myself Higher and Higher. Uddharedathmanathmanam - I raise Myself by Myself.

*****

A birthday gift...

...to my Guru Swami Akshara

It is half an hour more for June 12, celebrated by devotees as the birthday of my Guru Swami Akshara. I stand here with nothing to offer, but just myself.
Words fail me, as I sit here to type, thinking I could offer words as my birthday gift through this blog. But they come not out, stopping within the cave of my head offering themselves in celebration at the source, to the birth of Silence.
How will words come to wish someone who has neither birth nor death, "Many, Many Happy Returns of The Day." Foolish as it may sound, I still can't hold back that childish urge to celebrate as everybody does, locking the timeless eternity in a tiny vial so that I may experience with my senses five.
Strange scene this. A writer who cannot write! I drop all this writing business and fall at Your Feet In Total Surrender. When I think of flowers to offer, they vanish into nowhere. When I think of sweets, they are no match to the sweetest nectar of divinity that is your very being, when I think of clothes, I know no textile that can cover the effulgent brilliance that You are. So I drop all the gifts and drop myself too. Can a wave ever wish the Ocean a very happy birthday?

*****

The Potter...

...and the Pot

This body, I see is like a pot. Inside it is the breath, just as if filled with water. The breath holds the subtler mind. A mind that knows no meditation is like a pot that dances and rolls about the place, spilling out all its precious energy in any direction it pleases, but misses yet another great opportunity to know the essence of being.
But with silence, the mind reaches the brim of the pot, spills out in bliss. At the end of it all, when existence gives the pot a slight tilt, it joyfully flows out to become one with the very thing that contained it.
The remnants of the pot goes down, down, down to touch the rock bottom. It emerges again with another form and shape, once again the same energy to hold. Oh! this never-ending game of the potter and the pot!

Hmm...

...what shall I write

Even as I write the title, my outgoing breath actually said Hmm...and an 'R' added to it will make it the Pranava Mantra 'Hreem.'
Speaking of Mantras, it was an unusual experience today at the traffic signal. All sorts of vehicle sounds roaring, whining and whimpering around me like sound waves of different frequencies. Just about me there is sound. It is sound that circulates within me too, around a core field of Nischalam - Unmoving Silence.
Once earlier as I was just staring into the sky, it dawned upon me that at any point of time and place, there is, outside the noises of the whole world, in empty space total silence. In that field of emptiness and silence, sounds and visual images pop up once in a while and get subsumed in no second. This I saw was what we call manifestation.
Looking at various objects, whether it is the sun, people or things - I realised that my seeing and understanding has got nothing to do with the presence of the object. My light of awareness is cast on the person or thing when I open my eyes and that is what enables me to see. All movement and cognition happen in this supremely massive field of awareness - the limitless, eternal vast.

Obstacles

On my calendar

I have a beautiful date calendar that is year-less. Many table-tops in Chennai are adorned with this calendar as it seems to be this year's choice of corporate gifting. One of my friends asked me something inspiring. So I got this calendar from home and kept it on her table at office. Each day soon became a thought for the day, reading session. Invariably, I used to come and turn the day's page, read it to myself, meditate upon the words a while and then begin my day's work.
Now that friend has quit and the calendar has moved to my table. Right in front of me, I see the day's message not just once, but whenever my head turns right, it is there.
Today's message is striking: Obstacles are those frightful things you can see when you take your eyes off your goal.
Contemplation: when my goal is self-realisation, the small gifts I thought were denied to me seem great obstacles, when I look at them. I just have to shift my focus to the big-big ideal in my life and the obstacles evaporate as if they never existed.
This reminds me of a beautiful verse in Tirumandiram when I thing of the focus of vision.
Marathai Maraithadu Mamatha Yanai - The elephant doll, hides the wood it is made of.
Marathin Maraindadu Mamatha Yanai - In the wood is hidden the elephant doll to be made.
Parathai Maraithadu Parmudal Bhootham - The Universe of elements five hides the Param Divine.
Parathin Maraindadu Parmudal Bhoothame - In the Param is hidden the Earth and other elements.

So when obstacles hide my sight, I just have to look through it into the open, but apparently hidden divine...

Thoughts...

....Continue to flow

I remembered half a cup of tea in the flask. Though I was thirsty for water, I gulped down the tea for its taste. The thirst still was there and I drank some water to wash down the taste of tea.
Though the presence of Grace is abundant as water, the mind goes to fixed forms and names. Stung by sorrow, not finding fulfilment, it has to bathe in plain pure grace for its own contentment.
*****
When so many words happen effortlessly, what a funny thought is it that creeps from within to assert itself and say, "I write."
*****
Asana is important for the task that I need to do. When I was in Yogasana, thoughts flowed ceaselessly. When I slipped into 'relaxasana,' hands supporting my head and legs propped up on the bed, sitting as I do on the same easy chair, thoughts cease and left this way, sleep will soon overtake.
*****
As I write one thought, there is a thought of whether, I will get a next thought. But though I know it keeps flowing and flowing, doubt and suspicion do strike at times.
*****
Even writing is a Karma, which if I do ceaselessly, will soon atrophy and disintegrate into boring words. I have to most often stop, put down my pen, close my eyes and be with the silence of the infinite vasts. My batteries are charged and coffers are full. I can trade with energetic words for while and the same process continues...
*****
Closing my eyes, I hold my head with my interlocked palms. As the little fingers press the neck of my head, I feel energy rushing up and getting locked in my head.
*****
Over my legs propped up on the bed, the air circulated by the fan, travels as if they were waves from some invisible stream of water.
*****
Here I stop with writing to get back to reading and recharge my energies with a little knowledge.
*****

Thoughts are birds

....flying in the skies of Consciousness

This marks the beginning of my third night duty since I began blogging two months ago. Mornings during night duty gives me a lot of time for meditation. The thoughts began as single sentences
1. Consciousess is everywhere, but only the human beings and not the objects and other beings are aware of it.

2. Thoughts are like birds in the sky of consciousness. What is there is seen and at times shown to others.

3. My mind is the biggest and the only home where the Earth is the basement and the stars illuminate my terrace eternally.

4. Poets are those who pick up thoughts, cut, knead and cook them into tasty dishes and serve it to all.

5. Eyes are organic glass which conceal less of the divine than the rest of the body.

And then I began to put it all in writing....

When the bowl of cornflakes moved into my stomach...what was in the bowl is now inside me in some other form and that will shortly move around my body in many ways. A part of it will become a part of my form, emotions and thoughts and the remaining will soon exit to reach where it finally belongs.

****
Pranayama and meditation is all about experiencing and being aware of the consciousness in every cell of the being.
*****
When I begin to write, thoughts stop. Looks like Nature does not like her secrets to be told to all the world.
*****
Chin Mudram Yoga Darshanam
*****
Thoughts are the birds that sometimes fly past in the sky of consciousness. There is abundant grace to just see it swim past. But to catch and imprison it is the gross commerce of the butcher.
*****
In the mind, those are my neighbours who think the way I do and feel with me. Not even staying in different houses, but in the same room.
*****
This power of meditation that has seized me these few years...When I sit quietly and begin to focus, I feel an invisible presence of something immobile in the bridge of my nose, between my eyebrows, through my upper and lower jaws and some in the space between the two rows of my teeth - some pressure. Is it the stillness of the air inside a pot or water in a quiet placid lake? It is so overpowering that I am unable to get out of it, unless there's something else that I have to do. With such a face immobile, all this writing has been possible. When I close my eyes, I can't but observe that immobility once again. That rock like, powerful structure that moves me, is not as powerful as something within it that watches it, cool and unperturbed and can any moment melt this being into its infinite vast.
*****
The flow of Grace, when it happens is unstoppable. I just have to sit, wait and watch, instead of hankering here and there.
*****
It is the thoughts that flow through me, into my pen, then ink and then the paper. When I can see myself, the pen and the ink, I fail to see the invisible thoughts that are contained in the words.
*****
I asked for Grace and God gave me. I asked for Silence and he is giving it to me in abundance. When I am in Grace and in Silence - there is nothing around me that is not graceful and no noise that is not silent.

.....more on my next blog....

A State of Mind

Everything is just a state of mind

Since yesterday, I have begun counting my blessings. The first in the morning was the gentle breeze that wafted into my home when I opened window-by-window in the morning. The next blessing was the sight of two neem trees that have always been standing outside my house, but which I noted was a blessing. As I opened the door that led to a patch of the Universe outside bringing bright tidings from my alien visitor - the Sun, and plonked on the sofa to meditate, I stopped counting. I was in Meditation.
And then this thought came about being in a meditative state of mind. What a beautiful, yet oft-used expression it is, "a State of Mind." Everything is just a state of mind. I see the door and it is not a door, but a state of my mind. All the books on the shelf - several states of my mind, the Veena in a corner - a musical state of my mind.
Usually a tiny word such as state in this case, takes me into its trail on a tour of consciousness and there I went. When we say, it is this or that geographical state - it is a way of being, a collective state of mind of the people, customs and manners. The country is no country, but a state of my mind which draws the boundaries and demarcates, remembers its friends and enemies...
Then comes the wind state of mind, the water state of mind, the fire state of mind, the space state of mind the moon state of mind and the sun state of mind or the divine state of mind...
This state of mind happens when the body is quiet and all the particles that constitute the mind settle down in one particular state. Don't we also call a dead body as "lying in state."
After the international ramblings on various states of mind, I returned to myself into the silence where all the states dissolve into nothingness - nowhere to go and nothing to do, but to just be.
Swahilya.

When the going gets tough

The Tough Get Going

Why inequity? On this question, I have often pondered. But I must admit, the intensity of contemplation was heightened when I believed at times that I have been wronged or what was due was denied to me.
These are some of those times when I am literally holding on to the feet of all the Adwaita or Oneness that I have learnt from the Vedanta and Upanishads. But now I realise after much thought, when unpleasant situations crowd around you with intense velocity - just take the time to stop and watch, watch through the developments and there comes the answer.
When I have chosen self-realisation as my destiny in life, I have to remember that the whole Universe will conspire to see that I realise it. And part of this conspiracy to fulfill my own wish comes to me in many forms and through every type of person. When I have great heights to scale, can I afford to wallow with little trifles near the foothills? And so nature knows much better than my little intellect demands.
* * * * *
So, what was the lesson I learnt about inequities. The sportspersons stand on the same line at the starting point. They are all apparently equal. But a blow of the whistle shows that some reach first, some second and another third. Some trip and fall. Another sprains a muscle or yet another simply dropout or get disqualified. For each one that reaches the victory stand, there are many that tried but failed. The physicals frames are the same to the eye. But each contains a subtle baggage from the past. For some the balance is on the credit side and for others it is a deficit show.
* * * * *
The Universe is the greatest University that has taught me the lessons of life. And when I thought I got the best, those were the times of complacence. But moments when I felt I got the worst of it all, God, could there have been a better way to remove all the excess baggage of Karma that hold me to the Earth with its gravitational pull, not letting me soar higher and higher into the realms of the Unknown Eternity?
*******
Thank You Dear Universe for Your Lessons of Love Through Hatred and Inequities.
*****

Messages

When trees, stones and water speak....

Just before I put in this post, I tried twice to put in a blog on 'The Pangs of Separation,' but both times my computer wouldn't let me publish my post both times after all the alignments, settings, colour was given. It was a message from Providence that I should just stop there.
This Universal Messaging System is one thing that I have observed happening constantly around me - when I just looked out of the door at home and saw the leaves of the coconut tree, I just had to close in on the space between the two thin leaves to get a lesson on the mild yet strong web of connectivity that pervades the whole universe.
Once it was while travelling in a bus and I got a call on my mobile phone. For receiving the signal better, I had to lean a little towards the window and it got clear. Eureka - a thought on life emerged - With our ideas we construct an encasement around us just like the bus and this often prevents us from picking up the signals floating freely in the air.
Looking intently at a lamp a lit for meditation I was able to see that, the lamp, the oil, the wick and the match stick create the conducive situation for me to witness that superfine presence of energy which in its even more superfine state is called Param.
As for the messages written on the forehead of cars on the road - they are innumerable - When I need it most I will read: My Presence Shall Go Before Thee or U Think Positive and The Rest Will Follow or the more contemplative ones such as Music Makes The World Go Round, Who Am I? or simply names of gods and goddesses or mantras that immediately hold my wandering mind and remind me of the presence of the divine.
It can be a film song while travelling in a share auto, or just a traffic cop yelling from the pit of his stomach at some errant cyclist, or the grumbling of a bus conductor, or an SMS that flashes the answer when I have a question in mind, I know beyond doubt that it is here, there and everywhere.

*****

Mobile meditations

Meditation on the Move

The different modes of transport which I made conscious use of for my meditations have left me a lot more better than when I began. It was in 2000 those times when I was conscious of something called Yoga. An auto accident on August 15 from which I miraculously survived with just scratches on Beach Road gave my mind a jolt. It moved me from the "I, My Family, My Work," thought to a different plane of thinking. It was then that I asked myself this question: What is the purpose of my existence?
Then while participating in a Yoga programme, I once contemplated on my expansion of responsibilities on my return home by a Metropolitan Transport Corporation bus - I am responsible for the welfare of the driver, the conductor, all the people in the bus, all the persons who built this bus, the inventor, the industry behind bus manufacture, the corporation that runs it, expanding into the road, all the people I can see within eyes' reach and spilling out of my city, my country and the whole wide world. When I got off at Royapuram, the realisation dawned on me that "I am the Mother of the whole Universe." Walking with that intensity of thought a little while, I heard some little child on the road cry out for his mother and it struck a chord in my heart and I looked around in response.
Since then, it was a forced travel in buses that taught me all my Karma Yoga, the Patience, the Compassion, the Fearlessness, the Skill and Dexterity and all the time for meditation. Many a poem and song was written during my bus travel.
As for the train journeys which became more frequent since 2000, it has always been satsang time with my fellow travellers when a major part of the compartment will join in the discussion or poetry and music sessions.
Now it is the time for my Honda Activa. While I catch up on my loud chanting and singing, enjoying the solitude behind my purple helmet, the sights and sounds of the road are all a trigger for contemplation and meditation. That life alternates between action and rest, I realised when the speed on the road will culminate with a brief wait at the signal. Then I switch off my bike, keep my hands in Brahma Mudra and remain in tune with existence...